When I wasn’t paying attention, I grew up. \u00a0Not just the done with school, moved out of the house part but the gray hair and the slightly achy joints, the need for bi-focals, the forgetting how to knit a particular stitch. \u00a0Last night I pretended I hadn’t grown up. \u00a0I pursuaded the family to pile into the car at nearly 11 at night and we drove off into the darkness in hopes of seeing the Aurora Borealis. \u00a0We drove a considerable distance –nearly 100 miles roundtrip — but we didn’t find the Aurora, only stars and satellites, the Milky Way and the darkness. \u00a0For a brief moment I felt all the promise and possibilities again. \u00a0I didn’t get to bed until 2:30 but that was okay. \u00a0When I woke up this morning I felt enthusiastic and hopeful again.<\/p>\n
Its scary to contemplate the end that is near. \u00a0Not near in the immediate sense but near in that its closer than the start of things. \u00a0I can understand why people cling to the idea of god and heaven and an after life—the idea that this is it is so huge and daunting and downright frightening. \u00a0This is It and yet, what the heck have I done? \u00a0I have debts, a job I feel meh about, not enough free time, not enough money to retire, no real idea of what I would do if I did retire.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
When I wasn’t paying attention, I grew up. \u00a0Not just the done with school, moved out of the house part but the gray hair and the slightly achy joints, the need for bi-focals, the forgetting how to knit a particular … Continue reading